More than 60%* of 18-25 year old Aussies speak a completely different language than their parents when it comes to dating – “literally”. To ensure that no one talks past each other in the future and terms such as “match” or “benching” do not remain a secret language, the new Tinder Dating Dictionary decodes the love language of young daters throughout Australia.

SYDNEY — FEB. 14, 2023 —  Every generation uses language differently – especially in the dating world. A recent Tinder survey found that 70%* of 18-25 year olds and over 1 in 2 (55%)* of 26-40 year olds regularly use dating slang. However, 63%* of young adults admit they find it easy to keep up with new dating slang, compared with only 50%* of millennials. To ensure conversations translate over your next intergenerational catch up, Tinder has launched its first Dating Dictionary in Australia to help decode the current "love language" of young singles. 

Although the basics of dating haven't really changed, as butterflies will always continue to flutter in your stomach, and you’re probably still hopeful there will be someone to sweep you off your feet, 62%* of Gen Z’s feel that they speak a very different language than their parents when it comes to dating. In the past, you used to ask "Would you like to come in for a coffee?", today it’s pretty frequent that you occasionally "slide into DMs” or “Netflix and chill”. And now when a potential "match" is a little sporadic with their comms, there’s a good chance you’ve been “benched”. 

Tinder Australia spokesperson, Kirsty Dunn comments, “We’ve seen a massive shift in how we connect and date - and along with that, the language we use to talk about dating and sex continues to evolve. Our Tinder Dating Dictionary aims to help make today's dating conversations a little more universal, so that everyone is able to share their experiences with all of their family and friends.”

The survey also found that almost 1 in 3 (30%)* of young aussies would like to talk more about their dating life with their parents, with only 41%* confirming they currently talk to their parents about dating. Maybe grandpa or grandma could be a good wingmate, with more than 20%* of those surveyed admitting they don’t currently talk to their grandparents about dating, but would like to.

Beyond dating verbiage, Tinder has also worked with local dating and sexperts, Georgia Grace and Jana Hocking to collate tips on dating in this modern age that every Aussie needs to know. 

Aussie Sex and Relationship Coach, Georgia Grace comments on the evolution of dating and sex, “We've seen radical shifts in the way people are dating, relating and having sex over the past few years. The rise in dating technology, a global pandemic, new research on sex & bodies is emerging and a sexual revolution have all had a significant and ongoing impact on the way people connect with each other. This affects everyone differently, some of my clients find the changes daunting, vulnerable and have no idea where to begin, whilst others are excited by the new opportunities, they're having better sexual experiences and love how dating is evolving.” 

Dating expert, Jana Hocking comments stating that, “If you're in the dating game, you're likely scratching your head wondering what everyone's talking about when they say they've been 'breadcrumbing' or they got 'ghosted'. It's a wild world out there, and this guide could be the key to saving your love life.”

FIRST DATE TIPS FROM SEX AND RELATIONSHIP COACH, GEORGIA GRACE

When my clients identify they’re ready to date again, I’ll ask them the following questions:

• What’s getting in the way between you and feeling confident right now?
• How is not being vulnerable currently serving you? 

Self reflection prior to dating can allow you to bring awareness to current behaviours and patterns that are useful and those that are not. The more we know about our wants, needs and desires, the easier it is to communicate this to others and look out for any red or green flags that may suggest whether they are meeting those needs. 

It may also be useful to reflect on the questions before a first date: 

• Why are you dating and what do you want? Whether it’s something casual or long-term - consider your intentions, aspirations and desires.
• What are your boundaries? What are you willing and not willing to do? Are there agreements, boundaries or requests you’d like to make – and what about your date, what are theirs?
• What do you need to feel safe? If you’re meeting someone new and unknown, it’ll be useful to think about what you need to feel safe - and also what you can do to support them in feeling safe! Many people will share their location with friends/loved ones, or let them know where they are meeting. 
• What are your sexual health practices? Whilst many people may shy away from these conversations as it can feel a little awkward - it’s really important to discuss upfront. Discussing barrier methods, contraception, consent is an essential conversation to be having if you have sex with someone new

What is something you wished someone told you about dating?

Many people approach dating with the fear that the other person won’t find them attractive, funny or interesting - this calls for a reframe. Whilst you may experience a few butterflies or nervous energy going into the date, it shouldn’t feel like a job interview. Instead of asking “Will they like me?”, switch to “Will I like them?”. A simple wordplay to shift the ‘being chosen’ mindset towards ascertaining whether you want to spend more time with someone can be an empowering and effective approach to building your self esteem. 

FIRST DATE TIPS FROM DATING EXPERT, JANA HOCKING

• It’s ok to have one glass of wine before a date to calm the nervous, but no more than that, you don’t want to turn up drunk!
• Have fun and be your authentic self! They are going to discover who you are eventually anyway, so don’t try to be the cool girl or guy, just be yourself. 
• Remember that they are nervous as well
• Always wear a perfume/aftershave. People are attracted to smell
• Self Hygiene is IMPORTANT! Brush your teeth, wear deodorant, present yourself in a clean and tidy manner. Bad breath, and body odours are a MAJOR turn off.
• Avoid ordering anything with garlic if you’re expecting a first kiss or a sleepover
• Enjoy the process of meeting someone new. Ask them questions about themselves and get to know them properly. When we are nervous we can get into the habit of just talking about ourselves, but remember it takes two to tango. 
• Plan your outfit ahead of the date, and give yourself plenty of time to get ready so that you are feeling confident. 
• Make sure you get there on time, arriving late makes for a bad first impression and can come across rude. 

What is something you wished someone told you about dating?

I wish someone had told me that heartbreak doesn’t last forever and that you will go on great dates again! I also wish they had told me about the red flags to look out for and that it’s perfectly ok to set healthy boundaries. It’s also perfectly ok to leave a date if you don’t feel comfortable. 

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NOTES TO EDITOR 

*This survey was conducted by OnePoll in February 2023 - survey of 1,000 AU 18-25 year olds and 1,000 AU 26-40 year olds.

ASSET FOLDER including the Tinder Dating Dictionary for Australia 

ABOUT TINDER

Launched in 2012, Tinder is the world’s most popular app for meeting new people and has been downloaded more than 530 million times.  The app is available in 190 countries and 45+ languages.  More than half of all members are 18-25 years old. In 2022, Tinder was named one of the World’s Most Innovative Companies by Fast Company.

Tinder Australia newsroom

For more information, please contact tinder@thrivepr.com.au